Monday, September 16, 2013
The latest edition to the "Woe is me" poetry collection:
Four weeks since you were nice to me
Laughed with me
Reached out for me
Made me feel
Like this was real
And we felt the same things
I didn't know
Missed you but
It might have been
All in my head
And the ache was made up on my own.
Tried to say
'He's just a guy,
This silence makes me cry.
He'll be back and we'll be fine'
But knowing the whole while...
It hurt to think of you
I cried though I told myself
That wouldn't do
Anyone who'd make me feel this way
Wasn't worth the time of day.
I'm out of tears
Just anger when my thoughts get near
To still wishing that you'll appear
With apologies for me to hear.
I guess you think
Not saying anything
Spares me pain and suffering.
But that's not true -
It just spares you.
Thanks for all you put me through
To keep up the lie
You tell yourself when you think
You're still a nice guy.
The only type of love I've had is the unrequited kind
When I dreamt of my life, this wasn't what I had in mind
I knew that there'd be heartbreak
But I never thought it'd be all on one side.
Knowing the answer is 'no' but still hoping it could be 'yes'
Finding out that you'll be there and changing the way I dress.
Hope is supposed to get us through
But mine only gets me in a bigger mess.
So tired of hearing "he's out there"
"Don't look and you shall find."
"It's always when you least expect it"
And other cliche'd lines.
I'm not looking for a a fairy tale
Just someone whose story fits with mine
Friday, May 10, 2013
Thursday, August 23, 2012
- The Caps Lock key on your computer should be able to toggle whole words/sentences/paragraphs between capital and lower case letters. Why do we have to delete and retype? It's 2012, people.
- Soda can rings should be perforated so they can be pulled apart before going in the trash. People are lazy and often won't go the extra step to find a pair of scissors and save a fishy's life.
- Magazines should have unsubscribe URLs on the back page, or even a rip-off reply card. It's obnoxiously impossible to get off those mailing lists. My mom once sent me a gift from what appears to be a catalog for Wiccans, and I've been getting their quarterly mailing ever since. It's not quite my style, and I have to assume that anyone who sells long, shapeless dresses and worships Gaia would appreciate saving a tree or two by not sending me something that I promptly throw away.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Having the coupled-up people in my life feel badly for my lack of a relationship doesn't actually make me feel any better. In fact, as someone who tries very hard to make sure everyone around her is happy, knowing that my relationship status is making others feel bad makes me feel terrible. And it is pretty much the only time I feel badly about my lot in love.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
A girl on a dating site is meeting some nice people, but none of them are really anyone she cares to see again. She goes away for a week to her brother's wedding, which she leaves with the takeaway that love is possible and comes when you least expect it. She decides to take a break from online dating and just live her life - a fun life, at that - for the time being and hope for the best.
Then, she's emailed by a guy who she'd been conversing with before the wedding. She had planned to meet him but was sick and had to cancel the date right before she went away for the family event. When he emails again, she feels guilty for not getting back in touch and has a first date. It goes pretty well, and there is a second. She realizes she's interested in him and gets excited for their third date, a low key affair.
But then! He calls at the last minute to suggest a much fancier plan and she has to mentally switch from county-fair casual to four-star restaurant chic. She excitedly tells her friends, and slips out of the office to buy a new dress for the night. Her work day is slow until the very last minute, when she falls into an urgent, rush project and almost misses the date! Somehow, she makes it home in time to gussy herself up in the new dress and has a wonderful dinner with Third Date Guy. Third Date Guy makes an overt promise to be, at the very least, her Fourth Date Guy and they end the night with a kiss.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
*do other people have favorite childhood ad campaigns? Is that the weirdest part of that statement?
That slogan is starting to ring a little too true for me - at least the first part. I'm a very loyal person and that includes brand loyalty. I was raised on Diet Coke, and Diet Coke is what I shall drink until my dying day. Don't even bother suggesting I buy Jiffy peanut butter if the Skippy is out of stock. That's just grotesque. In the past few years, the products that I love and rely upon have started to fade from the shelves. I think I'm cursed.
1. Citre Shine Hair Gel Once upon a time, there was a little Princess R-in the-P who didn't pay attention to fashion. Or style. Or humidity's effect on thick, curly hair.
Then one day she was cleaning the gym locker room after the 7th grade play was over (once a volunteer, always a volunteer) and got in a fight that involved flinging some leftover hair gel at her attackers. Someone suggested that, lo!, hair gel would be a good addition to the Princess' morning regiment and from then on, her locks did not remind any older brothers of the wind tunnel effect. And it was good.
Over the years, this product began to disappear. When she moved away for college, the new city did not posess a trace of the potion and the Princess' mother had to ship it up in care packages. She tried other products but they were too goopy or left white bits in her hair or just plain could not conquer her beast of a braid. Now, the product does not even exist for sale in her homeland and the quest for a replacement has been arduous and full of disappointment.
Okay, back to the 1st person narrative, that's exhausting.
2. Conair/Scunci Comfort Curved Bobby Pins Now that I am aware that hair can (and usually should, NJ stereotypes be damned) be smoothed down, it is a requirement. Bumps are not allowed. Sleek is in. I found these curved bobby pins once - once! - and fell in love immediately. They're amazing. Most bobby pins are wiggly little buggers that stick up and make you look like you're trying to hide antennae. These are curved to the shape of your head with out the wriggles and I need them in my life. Apparently, so do a lot of other people because when I search for them online I always end up on message boards with women like me complaining that they're no where to be found. Hear us roar, Conair! We want our smooth hair pins back and we want them now!
3. Smucker's Easy Squeeze Strawberry Jelly I didn't eat anything fruit-related until a few years ago. That means that I survived for years on straight-up peanut butter sandwiches. No wonder I drank so much milk as a kid (though a helluva lot of good that ended up doing...). When I finally got around to incorporating jelly into my life and my lunches, a glorious invention had been introduced to the market: an inverted, squeezable container guaranteeing that I would never have to stick my hand into the Smuckers jar to make a sandwich. My timing was impeccable. But now...the Easy Squeeze has started to go the way of the dinosaur! Or the Citre Shine Hair Gel! Every time I see it in the store I buy it, just in case it's the last time I see it. Do you know how many times that has happened? Once - because it is near impossible to find.
Here I am, a girl whose favorite ad campaign was for a company that, in it's own confession, didn't really seem to do anything. It's hard to see the things you love disappear, but it's even more difficult to be a female born in the 80s who does not find herself, at least every now and again, acting like a total Material Girl.